Humor - Military Communications

Military Communications

The story goes that in order to discover why the various branches of the military have problems in communicating with one another the Secretary of Defense called together a panel of four eager O-3's from the Navy, Army, Marine Corps, and Air Force. By way of experiment they are asked to jot down the necessary steps to accomplish a simple mission.

On the board he writes four words: Mission - Secure the Building.

Eager to demonstrate their budding leadership, the young officers hurriedly compose a list of necessary steps to fulfill the SECDEF's assignment.

The Navy Lieutenant carefully writes in his green pocket note book.
Instruct the Master Chief to have our people:
a) Unplug the coffeepots.
b) Turn off all computers.
c) Empty trash.
d) Turn off all lights.
e) Lock all doors on the way out.

The Army Captain prints in his cammy clad day timer.
1. Assemble the company.
2. Appoint guard mount and Sergeant of the Guard.
3. Take control of all exits.
4. Make sure no one gets into the building without a proper identification.

The Marine Corps Captain writes on palm of her hand.
q Assemble platoon and supplies.
q Approach building along three axes.
q Bring building under mortar / SAW fire.
q Assault building under covering fire.
q Sequester surviving prisoners.
a Establish lanes of fire.
a Prepare artillery calls.
a Repel counterattacks.

The Air Force Captain jots on his PDA.
1. Contact real estate agent.
2. Negotiate best one year lease.
3. Suggest option to buy.